fuck

so i know the only person who reads this or even knows it exists is michelle but i dont care i just want to type



I'm so fucking lost, I've gotten to a point where I don't even know what to do anymore.
to quote maroon 5 "waking up is hard to do, sleeping imposible too" or something close to that. i feel like im running around in circles and theres no way to get out of it.
thats why im running away after i get my licence
I love my friends not gonna lie but im sick of being depended on so insanely... i even think about not answering my phone for a day and i get reemed out by at least 10 different people... leaving the island?? haha yea right.
sometimes i just want to get away see something new but everytime i try i just get pushed back and i fall to old ways and fuck myself over... im so sick of not being happy anymore. i'm only happy sometimes and i know its all bullshit because the person who makes me happiest is a cock sucker who will never understand...... fuck....... fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuuck fuck. fuckity fuck fuck. i dont know what to do. and i hate feeling like this